"i know that it will hurt
i know that it will break your heart for the way things are
and the way they've been"

everyone is leaving.
how this saddens me
chicago austin san francisco bay
london
ma chere tells me that 
he sees new friends on a horizon
that is mine
i tell him that is fine
and that lonliness is sour
that i'd like the old ones back
please
he chuckles a bit
bemusedly eyes me
acquiesces
and
shrugs

`life is what you make it,
and i will not be remotely
adjacent to this home
anytime soon after i go'
that is the way he wants it
that is the option i am never given
or perhaps i passed it up
in the fervour of
youth
and
optimism

strength lies in self,
tho' the state of being
known as `alive'
lies
in the faces of those 
you chose to love
in the struggle to find
the Individual
we remove and recoil
from that which means
more
and
more

the longer it is away from us